Ahead of the Game: Come On Ingerrlund!

AHEAD OF THE GAME

Alpha mail. The only truly useful football e-mail

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Friday, October 12, 2007. 1600 BST
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The news in 60 seconds

COME ON INGERRLUND!
We may be without Captain Courage and Pesky Heskey but that shouldn't make any difference against Estonia tomorrow. After four 3-0 wins in a row, with St Michael of Owen fit and Rooooooney revitalised, England expects (and quite right too). We will be flying flags, thumping tubs, banging drums and singing God Save the Queen all weekend. All the previews, live commentary and reaction, just a click away.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/

BARRY BACKING
Who said Steven Gerrard doesn't do any defending? England's stand-in captain has stuck up for Gareth Barry, the Midlands Makelele, saying he would be right to feel "hard done by" if he was dropped for Frank Lampard. He says he likes playing with Frank too, but we don't believe him.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/euro_2008/article2645789.ece

CAMPBELL CALL
Fortunately, Sol Campbell's career hasn't gone south like his choice of club, because Steve McClaren has confirmed the Portsmouth defender will replace the injured John Terry. Campbell will resume a partnership with Rio Ferdinand that was once considered one of the best in the world. How's that for banging the drum?
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/euro_2008/article2646098.ece

WEIR WARNING
James McFadden may have had a statue unveiled on the Royal Mile in Edinburgh after scoring the winning goal against France - or did he just have his own stamp? - but David Weir says the hype and hooplah will count for nothing if Scotland fail to qualify for Euro 2008.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/scotland/article2641804.ece

REMEMBER KEWELL?
One for those Scouse Separatists (we know how you struggle during international breaks). Harry Kewell will be back in full training next week for the first time in a very, very long time. Rafa Benitez says he still has a role to play, despite the performances of Yossi Benayoun and Ryan Babel, but we're sure he means because of...
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/article2645399.ece

FABREGAS FOR BARCELONA?
Cesc Fabregas's agent says that neither he nor the player know anything about a Barcelona bid for his services (although the fact that he's answering questions on radio and in a newspaper must be a clue). Worryingly for Arsenal fans, he adds that the player would be keen to listen because they are a great club, etc.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/arsenal/article2646091.ece

DYER GETTING BETTER
Some good news for Kieron Dyer. The West Ham midfielder is on the mend after that horrific broken leg. Dyer is still a long way off returning to training but the bone is growing back around the fracture.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/west_ham/article2645980.ece

SOUTHGATE WAS RIGHT!
Would you like to see your name on a website because you failed to donate to Guide Dogs for the Blind? Probably not - and Alyson Rudd says that's why Gareth Southgate was right to criticise the nurses fund for blackmail. http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/middlesbrough/article2641700.ece

WENGER THE NERD
Arsene Wenger has confirmed what we've always suspected: he's a bit of a nerd. Not only does the Arsenal manager look like a likeable maths professor who's done one too many quadratic equations, he also spends his spare time trawling through statistics.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/arsenal/article2641701.ece

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>>>>>FANTASY FOOTBALL WITH BRAINS<<<<<
* Register today for PlayTheGame, so stat-tastic that even Wenger wants in
* It's free and you can still enter
* Win monthly prizes and tickets to the Euro 2008 final
* http://www.timesonline.co.uk/playthegame
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If you've got another couple of minutes

WE CAN WORK IT OUT
In recent days, Ahead of the Game has been more divisive than Mucca's divorce lawyer - but we think it's time for an amicable settlement (and we're not even asking for £25 million). A couple of days ago we innocently [ed?] suggested that anyone who preferred egg-chasing to footie was a hard-boiled heathen. But the yolk is over now. With the three lions roaring in the afternoon and the red rose blooming in the evening, tomorrow is possibly the best day's sport in the world ever . So we're calling for a truce, even if it's for one day only.
Anyway, supporting the union boys is not a huge commitment: take a seat at about 2pm for the football, watch Rooney rampage and then stay put for a couple more hours before enjoying 80 minutes of mayhem as Phil Vickery's men munch the French. After all, if you can't have an entente cordiale before a match with France, when can you?

CHERYL ISN'T A WAG, HONEST
AOTG hasn't snorted this hard since the last time it went out with Amy Winehouse. In a newspaper interview today, Cheryl "I'm not a WAG I'm just married to a footballer and BTW my best friend is Posh" Cole has been pouring scorn on women who live vicariously through their partners.
"I know there are a lot of desperate girls out there who want to get themselves a footballer," she said, while stroking the diamond-encrusted watch that Ashley bought her with his earnings from his part-time job as a call-centre operative. "I just think it's funny that anyone could be that pathetic. I know Ashley and nothing like that would affect us. It's embarrassing and depressing when I hear kids say to me, 'I wanna be a WAG.' That's not a job."
Girls Aloud have a single out next month.

PS - We found this entry in a dictionary. "Cheryl Cole": 1. a [intr vb], to utter a preposterously hypocritical statement that could easily be applied to the speaker. Said without a hint of irony. b [informal]. To indulge in a narcissistic self-love-in.

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1,209
Days since Wayne Rooney last scored a competitive goal for England. He was still playing for Everton at the time.
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A quickie before you go, sir?

HOLLOWAY HOLLERING
See Ian Holloway at his blathering best as he offers advice for monosyllabic managers. "We've got to be like the terminator..." and "My missus could do better than that..." are just two of his nuggets of wisdom as he reveals the mysteries behind an inspirational half-time hairdryer.
http://www.carling.com/pubfootball/halftime_withholloway/
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>>>>>THE TABLOID SCANDAL<<<<<
Jose's secret affair: he cheated on wife for two years - The Sun
What you need to know: 1) Chelsea soccer hero Jose Mourinho lived with a stunning blonde mistress behind his wife's back for two years. 2) It happened a few years ago, but it's still made it on to pages 1, 4 and 5. 3) Within weeks of wooing her, he started calling her "the one", which might explain where he got the idea for that catchy nickname. 3) She thought the Portugeezer turned Portusleazer looked like James Bond. 4) He likes to listen to Sting while gettin' it on and used to call her his "Princess". Not as classy as we thought, then.
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In TheGame

Belper - that's a football team, not a burp - have wrung themselves out after the summer floods in time for the third qualifying round of the FA Cup. Walter Gammie , who unlike AOTG knows where to put the capital letters on non-League, has been getting his feet wet.
http://timesonline.typepad.com/thegame/2007/10/belper-are-home.html
The boys from the TheGame Podcast have been flicking through their inbox and answering your posts on TheGame blog. Gabriele Marcotti fronts up about his contractual commitments with Chelsea and retrospectively reviews, er, retrospective punishments... http://timesonline.typepad.com/thegame/2007/10/meet-the-alonso.html
A Game Debate so difficult that even Martin Samuel , our Chief Football Correspondent, isn't sure of the answer. Believe it or not, he's actually grateful for your input. http://timesonline.typepad.com/thegame/2007/10/the-debate-ma-1.html
In "The Soul of Manchester United in 50 Moments", Times Online's latest must-not-miss list, Bill Edgar has revealed the top 25 reasons why United are the club they are today. And yes, they do have a soul.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/article2624171.ece

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>>>>>THE RIVALS<<<<<
* Rooney ready to roar again - Daily Express
* Roo: I owe you - Daily Mirror
* Terry is facing new op - Daily Mail
* Terry out and may need knee surgery - The Guardian
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Joe Bloggs' Soapbox

Does your reference to Gareth Southgate [and Clostridium difficile] mean that he's gonna get the s**ts?? Mind you, I would've if I'd lost Mark Viduka....
Dan Wilkinson is from Newcastle, Australia. Which gives him two reasons to support Viduka.

I suppose it's all a matter of taste but I prefer rugby because it is not permeated by greed, hypocrisy and dissimulation, and the players don't spit and swear at the referee. Football used to be a working-class game - now sadly it's watched mainly by an underclass (think Wayne from Wallsend) who sing Who's the B!£$%^d in the Black when us rugger chaps are intoning Swing Low Sweet Chariot - see what I mean?
Not sure we do. Sounds a bit elitist. Anyway, whether we agree or not, Frank Dobson from Morpeth has the last word on the rugger versus footie debate. Sorry Rhys, Dan et Al - we declared an entente cordiale.

Sometimes you just say it better than we do, which is why we've dedicated a small corner of this e-mail to your views and boos. Feel free to send us your opinions to sport@timesonline.co.uk
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Tomorrow's news today

- Martin Samuel on who's in and who's out for England and what it means
- Sol survivor: Campbell talks about his return to national service
- Scotland look to continue revival

And expect...

England to master Estonia, conquer the French, subjugate Sri Lanka and invade the Isle of Wight. All in one day. It'll be like the old days when we used to have an empire...

Spread the word. It's like pyramid selling but without the hassle. Click on the following link if you (or your friends) want to subscribe to this newsletter:
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/article2187217.ece

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